I’ve known about the Cinema Wasteland conventions for years now. I’m a long time fan/supporter of the Video Wasteland mailorder and have been buying stuff from them since 1994, so I’ve always followed what they’ve done. Their mailorder catalogs had a big influence on Razorback and myself over the years. When my good pal Steveggs started going to the conventions I would always hear about the great and fun times he had there and always wanted to go but just never got around to it. After last year when we both went to the amazing IMPETIGO reunion, we both started to talk about what we could do to top that special event. When my trip to Portland, Oregon was cancelled earlier this winter, I started thinking about making it over to Ohio for the Cinema Wasteland convention, especially since I knew that lots of my friends were gonna be going, especially lots of out of state AND out of country friends!! When Sly from FONDLECORPSE announced he was officially going, I knew right then and there that this was truly the time to go to the convention, and that I did! This was going to be like the unofficial sequel to the IMPETIGO reunion show from last year, but only this time it would be in a total horror/drive-in movie environment with nothing but the coolest freaks ever all hanging out and having some good, down to earth fun!
I got to JFK airport much earlier this time to beat the insane security lines, and this time it worked because NOBODY was on the line when I got there! This was a good sign right away. The flight was easy going and simple, it only takes 1 hour and 20 minutes to get to Cleveland! I arrived around 11am on Thursday and Steveggs picked me up and we immediately went to a local IHOP for some breakfast. From there, it was on to the infamous "Norton Furniture" store to meet the owner who makes these insane and retarded commercials that make no sense at all! We were laughing non-stop about this last year so it was so funny to finally go to that crazy place. Check my photo section to see what I’m talking about. We also went to the rock and roll hall of fame and snapped a few pics, and then we headed back to Eggs house to wait for Gregg from LINCOLN LOVE LOG and now CONVULSIONS to show up, as he was going to be staying with us in the motel room at the convention. Gregg showed up at Eggs house at about 10pm after driving for almost 9 hours. We hung out in Eggs room for a bit and then headed over to the local Jigaw club to check out TROUBLE live and goof around. Met some old metal pals from Parma as well. Good to see Duane Morris again! It was a fun way to kick off the insanity that was to come!
Friday morning came fast and me and Gregg hit a local place for breakfast called Eat And Park(I think that’s what it’s called?) while Eggs slept at home. We then all went shopping for food and drinks and stuff and loaded the cooler and the car up with amps, guitars, and all our bags of stuff and headed over to the Motel 6 to check in. We went into the convention at about 5pm and immediately saw Putrid hanging out and we hit up with him and started laughing and then the madness began! I was quite overwhelmed with how many horror merchandise tables were set up. It was a horror/drive-in fan’s dream come true! Literally THOUSANDS of DVD’s, posters, lobby cards, toys, and all kinds of cool stuff was everywhere! Gregg told me that the director of the early 80’s cheesy zombie film Bloodsuckers From Outer Space was there and he was talking to him for awhile, so I hit that table and started chatting it up with the director and bought an autographed DVD. I already had a bootleg of this but wanted this special edition with a cleaned up transfer and bonus footage. Then I went over to the Xploited Cinema table and immediately bought the new region 2 uncut PAL DVD of the rape/revenge classic MS.45! I was kinda not digging the prices on the DVD’s, though. Everything was about 5 or 10 bucks more than the online prices and that kinda took away my excitement to do DVD shopping. I realize the sellers are catering to the impulse buyers, but still, I’d rather do my DVD shopping online, especially with free shipping and lower prices! I figured I’d only buy some special import DVD’s and treated myself to only a select few gems, instead of buying tons of stuff.
As I was checking out an insane poster seller with tons of rare stuff, a voice called my name from behind and I turned around and it was my best horror pal Tanya the boargirl! I couldn’t believe that she actually made it all the way from Canada for this! Then I met her boyfriend Kevin and we immediately started hanging out, taking photos, and checking out all the cool horror goods all over! I’m still in awe that you guys made it, insane!! Right after that, I noticed a huge, hulking dude wearing a Frightmare hoodie and realized it was none other than Reuben, the mighty Splatterbeast! I ran over and greeted him and his killer gore-gal Ruth and we snapped a few photos. I was also wearing a Frightmare hoodie so it was kinda funny. Splatterbeast is an awesome guy and we hit it off right away! Then I met Greg and Erik from the Exploited Filth forum/chat room and we started talking about various stuff. It was cool to meet these horror freaks and Razorback supporters!
I also met a few other cool freaks from myspace like Thulsa Doom and Aggro Joe! Great to meet you guys. Joe spent 600 bucks on a 35mm print of Street Trash from Roy Frumkes, holy shit! And Thulsa, I’ll hook you up with that Savage Streets soundtrack on CDR you asked about man. Lemme know your shipping address!
Out of nowhere I saw Slasher Dave and his ultra-cool gal, Dez! We started talking and hit it off right away! This guy kicks total ass! Really down to earth, friendly, and full of enthusiasm! Totally the kind of people I like to hang out with. He was wearing the green Razorback logo hoodie that Putrid drew which I thought was really cool of him to do, as was Dez wearing a hoodie of it as well! Thanks for supporting Razorback so much you guys! I really appreciate that. I also met Slasher Dave’s sister as well.
I also met Shagrat, the killer artist who drew the new SLASHER DAVE CD art and has done tons of other killer art! You’re a really cool and laid back guy and it was really awesome to meet you man! I look forward to working with you again soon man! Your art rules!
Tom from Cardiac Arrest/Convulsions/Severed was there and we quickly greeted each other and talked about a bunch of stuff. It was great to meet up with Tom again as we’ve become good pals over the past year with him helping to run the Exploited Filth board and us sharing lots of the same views on today’s underground metal scene and stuff. We joked around with Gregg a bit and then Tom ran off to do some shopping.
Time passed and I started to think "where the hell is the Goregnome and Mrs. Gnome(Nickolle)"? Someone told me they arrived so it was only a matter of time until I found them....which I finally did! I haven’t seen Sly since last summer so it was totally cool to meet him once again! This guy is one of my best friends in the world and here he was back again in America! Then out of nowhere I met Jeff Zornow, one of the biggest supporters of Razorback ever and one of the greatest horror artists today! This was a total freakshow!
I also met up with Ryan Jones (aka Humanburger), the killer gore/horror/sci-fi artist from Canada! This guy was totally cool and nice just like he is through emails and myspace! Fucking insane that he made it to this! He gave me a preview copy of his upcoming comic book WRETCHED, which is going to be a killer 30 page underground gore comic that I’ve been waiting for! Great stuff!
Around this time everybody started to split up and went shopping for stuff, and I started to feel a bit hungry so me, Tanya, Kevin, and Greg went to eat some dinner and had a good time just relaxing and talking about various stuff. It was a nice and quiet dinner which was like the calm before the storm, haha! After that, we headed on over to my hotel room and took some crazy photos as Tanya and Kevin transformed into the blood-thirsty Boargirl and deranged drug-addict Acid Dropping Satan! It was awesome hanging out with these freaks who are some of the coolest and most die-hard horror/Razorback fans I’ve ever known! Then Gregg from CONVULSIONS showed up in the motel room and jammed some riffs he had for the upcoming material. Awesome stuff!
We all hung out a bit more back at the convention and talked about tons of stuff. But then Tanya and Kevin headed back to their hotel room to get some sleep. But there would be NO sleep for me on this night, as the party really began to kick into high gear. It was just non-stop insanity with me, Steveggs, Gregg, and everybody else just goofing around, laughing, and shouting "LET THE BLOOD FLOW" from the new DENIAL FIEND album at the top of our lungs until about 3am in the morning! I finally went to bed but got up around 6 am or so because I was wired and just couldn’t sleep at all.
I got up and made a few phone calls back home and then Gregg and Steveggs woke up and it was time to get some killer breakfast buffet at the hotel. We went back into the convention and all the freaks showed up and it was just non-stop hanging out, talking, and shopping! During the middle of the day, all of us went to some outside section of the hotel and took some massive photos of ourselves which totally fucking rule all! Don from Nunslaughter showed up and took the photos for us. Really cool to meet you again man!
Tanya and Kevin had to split early as they had a long drive ahead of them and it was really sad to see them leave so soon. It was awesome getting to meet you guys finally and I hope to see you back at this thing again in the near future! I’m glad we got all those fun photos to remember forever. After they left, I went back to the motel to hang out with Gregg and he started a barbecue with a small grill he brought and some chicken legs. What a fucking freak! I had to get back to the convention to pick up some DVD’s that I had ordered from Xploited Cinema as the convention was about to close for the night, so I ran there really quick and got my stuff to get back fast to get that damn chicken but those dorks Gregg and Erik ate it all! hahaha, fuckers!! You’ll pay for that!
I got to meet Dave from the killer LIQUID CHEESE fanzine and his writer/partner Ryan! You guys are awesome dudes, and thanks for hooking me up with the back issues bro! Glad you guys dig Razorback and I’m flattered you liked the lyrics I wrote for the BLOOD FREAK CD’s! Goretits forever! I also met Scott Gabbey from ULTRA VIOLENT zine! Thanks for the hook up on the mags, man! I was glad to finally score that issue with the Camille Keaton interview. Great stuff! Enjoy the CD’s!
A neat thing was getting to meet Ken Kish who runs the Cinema Wasteland convention and Video Wasteland mailorder! I gave him the BLOOD FREAK CD that had a dedication to Video Wasteland that Lucio Holocausto wrote. He was very humble and nice, and his company has been a big influence on Razorback over the years! Awesome stuff.
Finally me, Steveggs, Slasher Dave, and Gregg started recording some crazy noisecore/grind stuff in our motel room and got a few minutes worth of stuff done. It was pretty fucking BROODUL n’ SLAMMIN stuff! We all started to hang out in the motel room and everybody started to show up, including the amazing horror artist Adam Geyer! Holy shit, really great to meet you man! I wish we could have hung out more. Then we ordered around 8 pizzas from Dominos and continued to hang out, until we all went back on over to the convention hotel for a massive hang out that lasted HOURS with everybody going completely insane (I’m looking at you, Gregg and Jeff! hahaha you lunatics!!). I started getting really tired so I went to bed again around 3am, until Gregg woke me up and put a plastic lobster on my face and took photos of Steveggs while he slept putting dumb stuff on his face. Don’t ever get a motel room with Gregg, he won’t let anybody sleep at all! haha!!
Sunday morning came and it was time to pack up the car and have one last hang out at the convention with everybody. I had brunch with Jeff, Dez, Slasher Dave, Putrid, Sly, Nickolle, and Humanburger at the hotel and I think we all ordered the same thing, chicken fingers! haha. Gregg took off back to Illinois and Humanburger was heading back to Canada. I hung out more with Jeff and Tom in the Evil Dead room and went shopping with Sly and Steveggs a bit more. Slasher Dave bought Jill some cool vulture magnet and a Creature from the Black Lagoon magnet, and then we all headed over to Steveggs house for a giant dinner that his Mom made for everybody. It was awesome having everybody over at Eggs infamous place. Everybody had a great time and we took some cool photos on the porch that I’ll remember forever. Then we drove with everybody back to the hotel and said our farewells which was painful to do...but we already started to talk about the next convention in October! Hopefully even more people will show up next time to make it even more insane! (Kam Lee, Stevo, Mark Sawickis, Maniac Neil, Shad, Adam Screamatorium, Lucio Holocausto, Jose...I’m looking at YOU guys! heh heh).
I definitely left out tons of details in this, but this is what I can remember about the entire thing. Hope you had fun reading it. It was one of the best times ever and I look forward to doing it again! I wanna thank some people now for making this the weekend blast that it was!
*Steveggs: once again you are the MAN when it comes to setting up events like this! Thanks for hooking me up with a place to stay, getting the 3-day pass in advance, hooking up the motel room stuff, picking me up at the airport and driving me back, taking me to get food, letting me use your computer, and just continuing to be my best friend ever! You’re still the same totally cool guy after all these years and our friendship will never die!
*Gregg Metzgore: You’re fucking HILARIOUS man! It was great to hang out with you even more than we did last year at the Impetigo reunion. Thanks for being a funny, down to earth, and great guy...and for also being totally nuts and out of your mind! The jokes we made will last forever and I’m sure we’ll hang out again in the near future man! CONVULSIONS is gonna rule!! You’re the new BC, haha!
*Sly the Goregnome and Nickolle: I can’t believe you made it to the states a second year in a row! You’re the coolest ever man! There would be no Razorback without you man! Great to joke around and hang out with you bro, and I hope you enjoy the rest of your time with Nickolle! It was nice to meet and hang out with Mrs. Gnome again. We had some great laughs and don’t forget the classic ".........................." hahaha!! I’ll be calling you guys up on the phone soon to see what you’re both up to!
*Tanya and Kevin: Thanks for making it all the way from Canada! You guys rule! Thanks for being such cool freaks and fans of Razorback and for the amazing support and for being REAL horror fans that are truly into this kind of stuff. Thanks for also bringing Squeak along, great to meet him finally! I wish you guys could have stayed longer, but there’s always next time! It was so unreal to finally get to meet you both!! I still can’t believe it, haha!
*Tom: Fucking awesome getting to hang out more with you this time than last year man! Thanks for jamming those CONVULSIONS riffs for me, that shit kicks ass! We got some cool photos taken, and hope you enjoy the CD’s and stuff! Wear your ultra slamming DECREPITAPH t-shirt with pride, man! haha! And next time Gregg is gonna sleep in YOUR motel room and not mine! haha!
*Slasher Dave and Dez: Holy shit, you guys rule! Dave, thanks for letting me hear that advance new Slasher material, along with the AMAZING song by CRINGE! That stuff is unbelievable! Folks...Slasher Dave is more than just synth music, wait til you hear what this guy can do with some REAL DEATH FUCKING HORROR METAL! Also thanks for buying Jill some goodies and for all the great words you had to say about Razorback, I truly appreciate it man! You and Dez are the kind of people that make doing Razorback worthwhile for me and Jill. Thanks for all the true support.
*Putrid: This is the 3rd time we’ve met and hung out man! Great to see you again! You’re always the most enthusiastic person ever for horror stuff and you’re also my favorite artist around. You’re like a celebrity at these horror cons, man! Woah! Everybody was raving about you man. You just totally fucking rule and I see huge things for you in the future, bro! It’s an honor to work with you on art projects man! Don’t forget about me when you’re rich and making tons of cash in the future, haha! See you next time at the BLOOD FREAK show! And don’t forget, the REVOLTING and HOODED MENACE art is going to kill!
*Jeff Zornow: Great to FINALLY meet you! I always tried to stop by the Evil Dead room to see what you were up to and I’m glad we got to hang out bro! Thanks for letting me hear that new FKU stuff, sounds fucking killer! Your art is amazing and you deserve all the success in the world! The 10th anniversary t-shirt art you did totally kills man! Looking forward to hanging out again in the near future, bro! Thanks for being such a die hard Razorback fanatic, it means a lot to Jill and I.
*Splatterbeast and Ruth: Hey Reuben, we gonna pahrty like the scars do!! haha! You guys kick ass! So killer to finally meet you in person man. Thanks for the drawing you gave me and for all the cool talks we had about horror stuff. Hope to meet up with both of you again in the near future at one of these things!
*Greg and Erik: Very cool to meet you guys! Thanks for all the great support you’ve shown Razorback over the years, I really appreciate it! Erik...you owe me some chicken, dude! haha
*Humanburger: That rules you made it man! Great to meet you finally, and I hope to meet up with you yet again at the upcoming BLOOD FREAK show later this year! You’re a killer artist and I can’t wait to get the first issue of your comic book, man! You rule! Enjoy the t-shirt man.
Did I miss anybody else in this? I hope not! Phew...time for some sleep! This was a very memorable event for me and I recommend others to go to this thing! It’s very down to earth and easy going with no corporate aspect to it at all! (well, I did see some people trying to promote the shitty new PROM NIGHT remake, but nobody seemed to take any of the promo flyers they had for it, haha!! fuck that dumb looking PG-13 weak assed crap!).
Til next time, LET THE BLOOD FLOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
